Episode 3 - Quiet Time; Be Honest; The Crown; Changing Your Mind
Topic of Discussion
In this episode, we discussed Quiet Time.
For Lueda, quiet time means sitting in a space without noise in order to get honest and get real with what’s arising in her life. Quiet time is taking the opportunity to intentionally sit in a space of silence (or near quiet) without any distractions and to allow herself to be present. Lueda uses it to reset her mind and reset her body, but she also knows how intentional she has to be about including it in her schedule. Lueda practices her quiet time in the morning, because that’s when she’s able to connect with her God, to pray and to allow herself to enter the day in a gentle way.
For Alexis, quiet time isn’t as challenging, but I do need to work on getting better about “true” quiet time -- time without any ambient noise like the TV or music or podcasts. I work this into my daily routine by meditating in (almost) silence and praying in (almost) silence. Quiet time doesn’t terrify me the way it does Lueda, but I do need to be more intentional about allowing it into more places in my life.
As swimmers, we’ve experienced a lot of quiet time that we both love. When we’re in the water, almost all of the other sounds in the world disappear. We can hear our breath and the rush of the water -- and that allows us to be in a space of presence with whatever is arising. To be fair, that quiet time often came in smaller chunks, as you’re only actively swimming during sets, which made it easier for both of us to digest at times. That outlet of quiet time is still really important for both of us in our adult lives.
What does quiet time look like for you? Any tips for Lueda and Alexis on incorporating more quiet time in their lives? Tell us by emailing us at areyoutwostillfriends@gmail.com.
Friendship Tip
In this episode, we discussed the friendship tip of “Being honest with feelings.” As both Alexis and Lueda have discovered through their years apart, when you don’t have regular in-person contact with a friend, honesty becomes crucial to maintaining a healthy, thriving relationship. It’s through honesty with kindness and compassion that friends are able to connect on a deeper level, even when they don’t get to see one another regularly.
Honesty clears up the stories each of us tells ourselves and prevents confusion and unnecessary pain from taking the steering wheel in a friendship. While sharing feelings and being honest requires vulnerability, it’s the only way to have a deeply connected, fulfilling relationship.
Keep in mind, even if you don’t have language for how you’re feeling, let your friend know that you don’t have the language for your feelings! Your friend, if they really are a friend, will work to understand what you’re trying to communicate.
What’re your strategies for this tip? Send it to us at areyoutwostillfriends@gmail.com.
What questions are we pondering this week?
Lueda: What habits help me build momentum?
Lueda just completed 30 days straight of working out through her Peloton subscription. Go Lueda! Now that she’s reached that milestone, she’s considering the habits that have helped her reach this point, and what else can she do to continue forward with the momentum she’s created. She’s a big “don’t break the chain person” which helps her stay motivated, so that’s an external motivator that will help her keep moving forward. She’s also around people right now who are experiencing a variety of health issues, which is helping her pay-it-forward to her future self by caring for her body today.
What content are we consuming this week?
Alexis: The Crown
I’ve watched all the other seasons and am excited to start into this new season! I’m looking forward to seeing the depictions of Princess Diana and Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. It’s been interesting seeing how Diana has been portrayed thus far (I’m only one episode in). I’m curious to see how her character and the depiction of her story will unfold throughout the rest of the show. It’s also interesting to consider how the British Monarchy has been turned into a commodity...and The Crown is just one example of it!
What’s something uplifting you’d like to share with others?
Lueda: It’s ok to change your mind
This is one of the most important things we as a society can do in the next 12 months, according to Lueda. It’s a lesson she learned very young thanks to great adults who fostered that belief in her. We need to move away from shaming people when they gather more information and making a decision about how they feel about a topic, based on the new information they received.
What’s something that’s sparked passion in you recently?
Alexis: Snowboarding
It’s the winter and I’ve had the chance to take advantage of the amazing snow in Japan. I’m looking forward to a full season of snowboarding with my spouse (who skis) and exploring new ski resorts throughout Japan. “Japow” is some of the best in the world which makes it even more fun to experience!
In friendship,
Alexis & Lueda
