Episode 8 - “Things We Say Now”; Hard Conversations with Love; Harry Potter Wands; Sharon Says So IG Account
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Topic of Discussion
In this episode, we discussed adding the fun saying between friends, “The things we say now.” There are times you realize you’re not 16, 25, 36 or even 42 anymore! And this saying can help create levity around the lost sense of youth as well as the sometimes painful and more challenging aspects of getting older.
I picked up this saying from the movie Wine Country and I thought it was so hilarious how the characters shared this phrase between one another; sassy, sarcastic and with a little melancholy over the longing for better times in their younger age.
As Lueda and I talked on the podcast, we discovered for ourselves how fun this saying is between friends and how much it makes us laugh. It brings back a sense of nostalgia which feels good, but not so much so that you wallow in a past that’s now gone.
Have you tried this saying before with your friends? Do you plan to give it a try? Let us know your experience at areyoutwostillfriends@gmail.com
Friendship Tip
In this episode, we shared the friendship tip of having hard conversations….with love.
This is a really important tip for Lueda because she’s been on both sides of hard conversations done with love. It’s helped her grow, mature and be a more thoughtful, self-aware person. But, as Lueda points out, often in friendships we don’t always feel like we have the permission to have hard conversations with love within friendships.
Don’t get us wrong...this is hard! It requires bravery, courage and vulnerability -- three ingredients that allow for deep connection with another. In our experience, when these hard conversations are had with love and vulnerability, however, they only deepen and strengthen the friendship. It can be helpful to frame these conversations as, “This friendship is important to me, so I want to bring this up because I care about you and want well for us in this relationship.” Approaching any hard conversation with kindness, gentleness and a true desire to better the relationship is key to being heard and not putting your friend on the defense.
A lot of times, hard conversations need to be had because change needs to occur. That may mean establishing boundaries, letting your friend know about behavior that’s affecting you in a negative way or something that’s changed in your own life that will affect your friendship. Remember, it’s crucial to frame any of these types of conversations through the lens of you valuing deeply the relationship and your friend.
If you find yourself on the other end of a hard conversation with a friend, remember, if they really are a friend, they want to see what’s best for you! They don’t want you to fail or experience more suffering or want to “win”; they want to see you thrive in the midst of whatever challenges you may face in your life. Emotions may run high on both sides (they may not), but remember why you’re there and why the conversation is happening.
Do you have tips for having hard conversations with love? We’d love to hear them and share them with our listeners! Send us an email at areyoutwostillfriends@gmail.com
What questions are we pondering this week?
Alexis: What wand should I get at Harry Potter World in Osaka?
I’m getting ready to visit Universal Studios Japan again and every time I visit Harry Potter World, I have a tradition of getting a wand. I currently own the wands of Hermione Granger, Sirius Black, Professor Minerva McGonagall, and George Weasley. I’m wondering now whose wand I should collect next and I feel torn between Draco Malfory’s, Luna Lovegood’s and Neville Longbottom’s.
What content are we consuming this week?
Lueda: The Sharon Says So Instagram Account
A former history teacher, Sharon uses her account to answer questions, for adults, about the government. The way she answers questions around topics that can be very emotionally charged or historically partisan is very straightforward and with facts...not her personal opinion. She makes understanding our government easier and approachable, allowing for more people to get involved! This is the type of space we need in today’s political climate to understand and develop an appreciation for our government and to become more informed around the important topics we vote on.
What’s something uplifting you’d like to share with others?
Alexis: Sunday Morning Chill playlist on Spotify
On the Sundays when I‘m home, I’ve started listening to this playlist to welcome me into the day and I’m loving it! It’s a very easy-to-listen-to playlist that feels like a Sunday morning. It’s great background music for drinking coffee, making pancakes or doing the crossword (ot whatever else you like to do on Sunday mornings).
What’s something that’s sparked passion in you recently?
Lueda: Kate Kennedy’s (Be there in Five) Spotify Playlists: Making Bead Lizards, Pensively Playing Solitaire, Mismanaging Romantic Expectations
Lueda listens to Kate Kennedy’s podcast and through it discovered these playlists that are making her absolutely giddy. So many of these songs bring Lueda back to her middle school and high school years and make her laugh at how silly and dramatic she used to be. It’s fun to find music that is uplifting and makes you want to listen to even more music. Check out these playlists and see what period of your life they speak to!
In friendship,
Alexis & Lueda
